Back to the 80s - Beth and Kirk's wedding

Everyone thinks Beth and Kirk are the best couple, right? We have all been waiting with bated breath to see what their wedding would look like. Posh was just not right for them and we all knew it was going to be fun and quirky, just like them, and it was!

But who knew the normally confident Kirk would get cold feet? Kirk is confident, normally. He is very comfortable in his own skin and knows who he is. He never seems to think badly of himself or have self esteem issues. Kirk is loyal, kind, honest, a hard worker, loves dogs, and if he's not the sharpest tool in the box, he makes up for it by sticking with the people he loves through thick and thin. It broke my heart, therefore, when Beth's gobby family (but you didn't think she'd have any other kind, did you?) decided he was not good enough for her. Beth stoutly defended him but it seemed to have cut Kirk to the quick. When he overheard Beth's relatives really slagging him off, I thought he was going to cry.

He expressed doubts to his friends, thought he wasn't good enough for her and was scared to pieces about having to dance and make a speech, not wanting to let her down. But describing how he felt about Beth to Chesney, like the sun just burst in his chest when he sees her, that right there is the kind of love you want someone to feel for you and who cares if he packs boxes for a living? You don't get that kind of love very often and you're damn lucky if you do. I loved how Chesney told him that he was his hero, with "Superman" stuck to his head. He really is a hero.

But, on the day of the wedding, he went walkabout.

Was he really convinced Beth would be better off without him? We were left at one point, at the registry office, wondering if Kirk would show up. As much as you might think, this was just contrived to add a bit of drama to the day and he'd show up suited, booted and bewigged with a goofy smile on his face, there was that niggling little doubt. Kirk doesn't have wobblers as a rule. And so he did, wanting to make Beth's day just that much more special by coming as Adam Ant, her favourite!


Here's a look at the wedding day:

Kirk doesn't want to get anything wrong and is convinced he's going to do it all wrong. The bridesmaids look awesome and Number 5 is poisonous with hairspray fumes.

 Julie's sweating over the cake, it's Mary to the rescue and they nearly overturn it on the street.

Here's the problem, Kirk walked out of the house and nobody knows where he is!

Now what? Bride's worst nightmare. She's so upset that she's insulted her future in-laws!

Oh never mind, he's here and he changed his costume from another Blues Brother to Beth's favourite, Adam Ant and all is forgiven.

Ooh and they even decorated the room! Brilliant! Though if they'd lost their slot, the lesbians from Levenshulme mightn't have been too keen.

The wedding was wonderful! Beth wrote her vows and of course Kirk just couldn't do it but spoke from the heart. Brief, simple and true and there wasn't a dry eye in the house, me included!

Kirk's parents were looking on, were they emotional or just horrified? I don't know but it doesn't matter, does it? A wedding that was as excellent and unique as I hoped for!

Meanwhile, what's up with Sally Webster? She and Tim got all hot and bothered at Carla and Peter's wedding and this time, they didn't even make it to the wedding! Tim must be way hotter in bed than Kevin!

Steve, meanwhile, is doing his bit for the 80s, fiddling with a real Rubik's cube and off with the fairies. Irresponsibly, Liz decided that she had to do some shopping before visiting Andy in Spain. Even more irresponsible, Michelle, even if she's ticked off at Steve, should be sacked by leaving Steve alone in the bar to handle a wedding reception while she goes on a date. She knows she can't be sacked if her name is over the door but if anyone's pushing Steve over the edge on this day, at least, it's her. Of course Steve can't cope and he just leaves the pub to the punters to it, free booze and he couldn't care less.

The first dance was supposed to be Lionel Ritchie's All Night Long but Beth's mam hit the wrong button, probably on purpose, and they had to make do with Push It!

Kirk's dad, Eric, was even getting jiggy with it!

It certainly got the audience jumping, including, surprisingly, Kirk's dad who was very flirtatious with Tracy Barlow!  The In-laws' gift is free tickets to Cypress where they live. Ok. Romantic honeymoon in a donkey sanctuary with the in-laws? Um....

Most of the reception went smoothly except Sinead's mother latched on to Dev who was flattered but Julie sizzled and fumed until she blew. BACK OFF, LADEH! Dev understood and they're ok with it all.

Kirk kept freezing up over doing a speech so Beth had to do some damage control. They had some "us" time in the back yard of the pub that Kirk decorated with lights and a romantic table for two, and made some very special vows to each other.

Julie caught the bouquet, much to Mary's chagrin.

Carla gave the couple a night in a very posh country hotel and Tyrone lent them his car, decorated, to get there. On getting in it, Beth promised Kirk the best ride ever! Kirk's reply? Why d'you think I married her!!!

Awwww this is the best Corrie wedding ever!

But there were tears, too. Tracy was reminded of her failed wedding.

Julie was upset after the fight with a love rival. Steve withdrew inside himself.

Sean was sad because Billy never showed up until the very end. Liz has finally started to realize that she really should be worried about Steve.

Maria still blowing hot and cold at Luke. She's angry he ended up at the reception, made it clear she didn't want anything serious and then asked him back to her empty flat for a shag. Hot, Cold, Hot, Cold. Make it stop please.

Style:

We wedding cake! Frankie Goes to Hollywood style

The Bride was done up like 80s Madonna and the Groom was Adam Ant and looked great!

and there were two other Madonnas too, and Beth did "get th'ump" even if she pretended she didn't. The best man and Beth's Craig are the Blues Brothers.

There are gaudy shell suits. Sean is an early Wham era George Michael but for some reason is toting a tennis racket, sure to confuse.

Dev is a Ghostbuster while Mary is Molly Ringwald in pink and Mary has imagined herself as Sheena Easton though Julie reckons she's trying to match Dev. A happy coincidence, I think, on Mary's part.

Eileen looked awesome as Boy George in her Frankie goes to Hollywood tshirt and matched the wedding cake!

And just a few more snaps

Kirk plays a blinder this week

Kirkeh. He's gormless, he's not the sharpest knife in the drawer, and he's true, honest, loyal and the best friend you could have. Kirk has been on Coronation Street screens since October, 2000. He is the older brother of Maria and worked at and ran the dog kennel his parents owned for quite some time.

He's shown time and time again that he can be relied on as a friend and brother and this week surely proves it. As someone that's spent most of his life working with dogs, he knew that Schmeichel was gravely ill and he knew that Chesney wasn't ready to hear it. He took the dog to the vet and broke the bad news and supported Chesney even though he knew Chesney was trying to save a dog that couldn't be saved. But he quietly waited until Ches came to the right conclusion and was there to help the lad grieve.

Later, he paid the vet for the cremation and gave Chesney the urn. What a sweet thing to do! Kirk might not always have a clue but he's kind and generous and he can be thoughtful like that.He also tried to lead a prayer moment in the pub in dedication to a great Dane which had Peter, Karl, Dev and Ciaran giggling into their pints along with me and it was a Classic Corrie moment, that!

After the kennels went out of business, Kirk worked with Ashley in the butcher shop, but I don't think he was all that good at it. Probably frustrated Ashley to no end but even so, it was hard for Ash to lay him off when times got hard. I found it very unfair of Ashley not to rehire him. He hired Graeme instead, when Ashley was already trained and he'd promised Kirk the job back if things got better. Probably Graeme was less clumsy with a cleaver, but that's not the point. How could you look at that puppy dog face of Kirk's and not feel bad?

Now he's working at the factory in the packing department. Probably safer than running a machine. This week he also proved that he's not that bad a poker player. He did learn from Les and said he never could beat him, but I reckon Les cheated! Kirk proved he had a great puh-puh-puh-poker face (sorry, couldn't resist the Gaga moment there). He bested the odious Devster and then got out while he was ahead, claiming priorities. He was hungry!

Over the years, Kirk has provided much amusement for this Corrie fan. What of the matching leather jackets he and Jason got? yes, that was a bit boyfriend/girlfriendly but it wouldn't have dawned on Kirk. He's always been the pawn in various schemes, victim of Les, Cilla, and even Tyrone and Jason, his other best mates. Recently he helped Tyrone and Tommy collar a drug dealer to help Fiz out!

Kirk is one of the lads, mates with Jason and Tyrone from away back but makes friends easily. He's the best brother you could every want. He sure has been there for Maria when it counts.

Kirk also took the blame when Gary got into a fight outside the pub, reckoning that Gary already had a record but Kirk, being clean, would get off with a caution. He hardly knew Gary but stuck his neck out because that's the kind of guy Kirk is.

I laugh at gormless Kirk but I also love him. He's such a steady guy, open and kind, honest to a fault sometimes, and he doesn't know how funny he really is. Kirk is played by the talented Andy Whyment. I've met Andy and of course he's nothing like Kirk but when you see him smile, you can't help seeing goofy Kirk. However there's a lot more behind Andy's sharp eyes than Kirk and he doesn't bumble or stumble and man, can he ever sing! That's when you realize just how much talent he really has.

What's your favourite Kirk moment?